Friday, November 05, 2010

Hello to All - It is so hard to believe that 11 months ago today Bo left us. At times I think back and it feels like yesterday. The emotions are so raw and I worry that maybe I am not processing, but then I know that I am. The loss is just that real and painful, for both of us. Then there are days like today I wonder where and what in the world have we been doing for 11 months...that is a long time. I think of all the changes Addi did her first year and think wow that was a long time. For her 2 month until Christmas is forever, 11 months and we are managing without him. I do know that this holiday season will probably be harder than last, the last one I think we were in shock and well I was determined not to let Addi but the time of year in association with his loss. We would celebrate and we will laugh, no one (other than myself) enjoyed this time of year than Bo. Wow 11 months...
With that being said October was an incredible month for Addi's Cure. Touch a Truck, 2 Golf Tournaments and we supported Lungstrong a race for Lung Cancer. But Addi took Addi's Cure literally, as in she needs some curing...a swallowed penny, broken arm and stomach bug...oh yeah did I forget to mention that one. Addi got sick on Halloween with the stomach virus and couldn't go trick or treating. She cried whenever the doorbell rang, which I thought when the light was off you left a house along (teenagers). She did bounce right back and was raring to go Monday (too late to trick or treat) but enough time to take of me who thought why don't I get that too! I didn't bounce back quite so fast needless to say, good diet plan...but I think I would rather keep those extra 5 pounds.
Well November will be what it will be at least we get the cast off...and I do hope to post of picture of it...oops!
I did want to send a request out for some prayers, first for our friend Jerrold. A fellow lung cancer and transplant warrior. May he get the right doctors to help him with his bump in the road.
And now for my dear Uncle Mark. He was diagnosed with lung cancer a month ago yesterday and due to some results has realized his body is failing him in his battle and is going home to rest and find peace. Uncle Mark is a man that has overcome more than any one person should in their entire lives, but never and I mean never did I see him without a smile on his face. He, whether he liked it or not was my date to many and I mean many cousin weddings...Seriously I have a 100 cousins on my mom's side, but he was there for probably every one of them supporting us and I am ashamed that we were not more attentive to when he might have needed us. You always knew Mark would be at your wedding smiling, laughing and dancing throughout the evening. Shoot he was there for any family event. He shows us how to cherish a family and I can only hope the family in Kansas reiterates how much him being there meant to every one of us and it wasn't unnoticed. I am proud of the man his is and honored that he is my Uncle. I can only hope he understands that our bodies can only do what they can do. Our heart and spirit always will fight and carry on it is just those mortal bodies... As I mentioned he proved that he is the strongest physically, mentally and spiritually that any one person could be. I do know that my Bo will be there to greet him with a Carolina hug, but selfishly, I hope he will remind my Bo I love him, miss him, and thank him for our time together. I hope they both know that.
Take care and Love to All - Especially You my Uncle Mark
Christi and Addi
PS - Please pray for my family, this has all happened so quickly that processing always seems to follow a little later. Understanding why this is happening isn't something we always get to learn, but trusting and knowing there is something greater gives much comfort. This is probably good time to remember the serenity prayer...
PSS - Please also pray these doctor find a cure, a treatment, a something for lung cancer. Today a huge step was published that CT Scans do help detect lung cancer, now for insurance companies to cover this and determine who the deem appropriate for the screening...small step, but at least they are in the right direction...


Anonymous said...

praying for you guys always. love you both.
-love, mackenzie

Anonymous said...

Thank you Christi for posting what is in all of our heavy hearts right now. Losing my baby brother well be a very tough day, but knowing how much he was loved well help heal the heart sooner.
My heart goes out to you and Addi also. Holiday time is always a tough time of the year for me and it well be for you also. I just hope the good Lord keeps you as strong as you are now and you well prevail.
Again thanks for posting. Love, Aunt Marlene from Kansas